Day 395

Scripture: Ps 105:1-8; Acts 3:1-10; Luke 24:13-35

Scripture standout: Luke 24: "As they came near the village to which they were going, he walked ahead as if he were going on. But they urged him strongly, saying, "Stay with us, because it is almost evening and the day is now nearly over." So he went in to stay with them. When he was at the table with them, he took bread, blessed and broke it, and gave it to them. Then their eyes were opened, and they recognized him; and he vanished from their sight. They said to each other, "Were not our hearts burning within us while he was talking to us on the road, while he was opening the scriptures to us?"

His Deed/The Day: Ever go to bed mad and wake up angry? Ever feel like your chest and throat are so hot you just might vurp lava? I have been feeling this way for the past two nights about a situation affecting our son. He was sexually bullied at a Boy Scout meeting at Southside UMC (in a bathroom of all places) just before Christmas by a 16-year-old boy who is troubled, medicated, ADHDHAHDHDHD whatever, and poor thing, lives with his grandmother, and NEEEEDS scouting according to the adult troop leadership. We immediately airlifted Ben from the troop, but the boy who aggravated him continues on in scouting there. In fact, he was recently promoted. Ben was not physically injured or even mentally scarred, but he was terrified that night. And now we are left with adult troop leaders making excuses and defending the boy's behavior and giving him second chances — all the while discounting Ben's side of the story, and portraying us as overreacters.

This is all coming up again now because several friends' sons have made the cross over to that troop. They're asking questions. And I've been giving them honest feedback about our experience. Long story to a point? I have venom breath now. I go to bed angry. The mama bear's fur has been ruffled big time.

I feel like my deed to the troop leadership should be a fat stinging lawsuit! But that's not the answer. I want my deed to convince other parents to steer clear of this troubled troop! But perhaps that's not the answer either. I want the troop's deed to Ben to be some semblance of an apology or recognition of his feelings. But sadly, that isn't going to happen — so that's not an answer either.

Is there any deed, any do-gooding, that can turn this angry chest heat into a cool, refreshing breath? I only have to turn my head slightly to the left to see what is likely the answer. And there is little drama here. No mention of lawsuits. No pitchforks and torches. No creative literature about how things should play out. It's this, from 1 Thess 5: 16: "Be joyful always (seriously?!?! Even when Mama Bear is this angry?), pray continually (OK...this, I can aim to do) and give thanks in all circumstances (for my son being bullied by some a** hole kid, for Boy Scout leaders portraying my son as unreliable, quiet and overly sensitive...and me as overreactive? Furreal?). For this is God's will for you in Christ."

I get that. It's hard. But I get that. Today's deed will be to start a long mental list of reasons why I should be grateful for this experience. At this point, I can only think of one: that Ben is safe, and that nothing more sinister occurred with him or others. Finding other reasons to give thanks in this circumstance may be tricky, but that will be today's deeding challenge.

GD Boy Scouts.

Deedsclosure:

Day 394

Scripture: Ps 33:18-22; Acts 2:36-41; John 20:11-18

Scripture standout: Ps 33: "Behold, the eye of the LORD is upon those who fear him, *
on those who wait upon his love,"


His Deed/The Day: Another day of getting back to basics. I let two old ladies cross the road. Old ladies= opps for good deeds.

Deedsclosure: Just six more days of this experiment. And already, I feel sad that it's about to be over. Finally, after nearly 400 days of willing a good deed to come along for me to do, the act of do-gooding is beginning to feel a little more like habit. Isn't that strange and awful that it has taken this long for a daily duty to sink in? I mean, isn't it supposed to take 10 times to make something habit? Why is looking out for opportunities to serve others so unnatural and not second nature?

It's been so many days, I can't remember if I mentioned the act of asking. I read a book called "The Prayer of Jebez," or something like that. The idea was, you have to ask God to be a blessing and to "expand your territory." That's where it got into the "pray for money and success and God will give it to you" gray area that I detest about Christian literature. But I did really like, and now embrace, the idea of asking God to open me up each day to the job of blessing somebody. I like the idea of being the servant that has his hand up in the air. Sometimes after my morning runs, my prayer to God is "please use me today, put me to work, work through me to bless someone big time today." I'm not sure if it's the smoking gun of deeding, but it definitely puts me in the right frame of mind.

Day 393

Scripture: Ps 16:8-11; Acts 2:14, 22b-32; Matthew 28:9-15


Scripture standout: Ps 16: "I have set the LORD always before me; *
because he is at my right hand I shall not fall.
9
My heart, therefore, is glad, and my spirit rejoices; *
my body also shall rest in hope.
10
For you will not abandon me to the grave, *
nor let your holy one see the Pit.
11
You will show me the path of life; *
in your presence there is fullness of joy,
and in your right hand are pleasures for evermore."


Matthew 28: "And they came to him, took hold of his feet, and worshiped him. Then Jesus said to them, "Do not be afraid; go and tell my brothers to go to Galilee; there they will see me."


His Deed/The Day: Went back to the basics — let a car needing to turn in to my lane. Tacked $1 on to my bill at Publix for March of Dimes. Done.

Deedsclosure: Not sure if conscious daily deeding is your thing? Here's some good news that might change your mind. If you're a parent, a spouse, a child, a sibling, a friend — daily deeding is an organic, unplanned occurrence.


As a mom, I can tell you that my job description includes a full day of others-related activities. Like every mom I know, each day is a bouquet of  folding laundry, making beds, shuttling children to activities, making fun plans on their behalf and being available. As a wife, I act in partnership. As a friend, I am there to help when needed, listen and share experiences. In my most humblest of opinions, I feel that all of life's daily chores for others are deeds in themselves.


So maybe conscious daily do-gooding is an unnecessary challenge? Maybe so. Or maybe it is a course in being grateful for the daily opportunities life offers  — and that we have the capacity to seek more work on that long walk to Galilee.

Easter Sunday (Day 392 of Experiment)

Scripture: Ps 118:1-2, 14-24; Acts 10:34-43; 1 Corinthians 15:1-11; John 20:1-18


Scripture standout: John 20: "Jesus said to her, "Mary!" She turned and said to him in Hebrew, "Rabbouni!" (which means Teacher). Jesus said to her, "Do not hold on to me, because I have not yet ascended to the Father. But go to my brothers and say to them, `I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.'" Mary Magdalene went and announced to the disciples, "I have seen the Lord";"


His Deed/The Day: Everyone, myself included, seems to have gotten up on the wrong side of the Easter bed this morning. There was little interest in the homemade Easter egg hunt and disbelief that all of the eggs contained the same type of candy. Sighing. Disappointment. Quick smile for the camera:

In lieu of going back upstairs and trying again, we're all going to put on our Easter finest and head to church. Then we're going to host family for lunch — and I'm going to indulge in some Easter libations!

Today, Lent is over and the celebration of Easter begins. Light has overtaken the darkness, God wins! How fitting that yesterday, I had another "kitchen moment" — another reminder, not unlike the red jello incident, that our darkest moments often produce total beauty.

The kids and I decided to make a funnetti Easter cake. We chose the bundt pan, with visions of a beautiful Easter wreath sprinkled in Easter candy bits. The dream, however, was not to be realized. When I went to remove the cake from the pan — half of it remained like concrete to the pan sides. A crumbled mess of half the cake spilled onto the Easter plate. Crap! The would-be cake looked like the remnants of a three-year-old's birthday party. Yuck, so not-Easterly.

Upon further scrutiny, I decided the half-cake kinda-sorta resembled an arc. No, maybe a bowl. Better yet, a basket. Holy crap — an Easter Basket! Yes!

This is the result:

Deedsclosure: Holidays are the perfect occasions to share greetings, your time, your home, your love with others.

Last note of housekeeping: Today so ends the Lenten challenge of doing one conscious good deed a day. In eight days, I'll complete the 400 days of daily deeding, which will conclude the blog once and for all. Thanks for reading and happy Easter to you and your family. Make your Third Day count!

Lent Day 45 Holy Saturday (Day 391 of Experiment)

Scripture: Ps 31:1-4, 15-16; Lamentations 3:1-9, 19-24; 1 Peter 4:1-8; Romans 8:1-11; Matthew 27:57-66


Scripture standout: 1 Peter 4: "Since therefore Christ suffered in the flesh, arm yourselves also with the same intention (for whoever has suffered in the flesh has finished with sin), so as to live for the rest of your earthly life no longer by human desires but by the will of God."


His Deed/The Day: Today and yesterday was a fitting way to wrap up Lent — I had the honor of spending 24 hours with two of my four precious goddaughters. Anna and Julia Auchter came with Marley, Ben and me — and two other sweet friends — to watch Disney Toy Story on Ice. The tickets were free to me, but it was so much fun to spoil them all with Chic-Fil-A milkshakes and a bag of cotton candy. Isn't it just the best when you can spoil legitimately? Then the girls came back over to the house for a sleepover. The fun continued today, where we found ourselves by the pool at the beach. 


I am privileged beyond words to be Ben and Marley's mom. I adore every their every hair on their wacky little heads! I am also honored to be the godmother to four beautiful and spunky girls. They are the daughters of three special friends who have been spiritual guides and confidants and friends who are always and unfailingly — there. In addition to the gift of their friendship, my friends Katherine, Lindsey and Kristen have given me four of their little angels to keep an eye on: Anna, 11, and Julia 9; 

Eve, 4; (She's the one with her tongue hanging out of her mouth in concentration)

and Maggie, 4.

Being their godmother is not a chore, or a have-to or a pressure. It is a joy that I thank God for each and every day.


Deedsclosure: As long as it's not a habit or creates an expected standard of behavior, spoil a child you love. Be somebody's fairy godmother! Their smiles are worth every penny of the bibbity-bobbity-boo!

Lent Day 44 Good Friday (Day 390 of Experiment)

Scripture: Ps 22; Isaiah 52:13—53:12; Hebrews 10:16-25; 5:7-9; John 18:1—19:42


Scripture standout: Hebrews: "²⁴ And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, ²⁵ not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.


His Deed/The Day: Today is Good Friday. I wonder why such a dark day is called "Good" Friday. "The Worst Freakin' Friday in the History of the World" sounds like a better title — or maybe a switch out between Good Friday and Black Friday is more appropriate. But good? What the heck is so good about Jesus' death day?


I think our human reaction to death is to wallow in the despair and loss of it all. But the reality is, good ALWAYS comes from death — even if we don't live to see it manifested. I mean, you only need to read to chapters ahead to the story of Jesus' resurrection and the birth of Christianity to see what good came out of Jesus' death. When my mom died 20 years ago, I couldn't imagine what good was supposed to come from that. And I'm not sure I've seen that clear answer. But I trust God has a perfect plan, and somehow — everything happens for the good of God's kingdom.


Today's deed? Well, I know of a few friends/family who need a little spurring on toward love. I might sit here at the computer a while longer (yes, with two children wandering around hopelessly around the desk mouthing "I'm booooored," another reason there is not much "good" about Good Friday school break) and pen a few emails of encouragement. The rest of the day I think I'll reflect on how Jesus washed his servants' feet the night before he died for us all amid screams of "crucify him!"


Deedsclosure: Foot-washing at the Maunday Thursday service is a pretty remarkable experience. I highly suggest it if you haven't tried it before. The message? Even the Lord of us all isn't too good to wash the dirty soles of another. I found the experience to be very similar to the challenge of making a conscious deed every day. Like reaching out in a good deed, foot-washing feels uncomfortable and unnatural. It's aa very intimate act. And it's humbling. You have to get on your hands and knees and scrub one of the dirtiest parts of a stranger's body. And it takes your full attention — all the while, your mind's screaming, "oh wow, yuck — I'm washing a stranger's foot. Awkward!" Your heart? It simultaneously thunders, " and this is the right thing to do." A ying and yang.

Lent Day 43 (Day 389 of Experiment)

Scripture: Ps 116:1, 10-17; Exodus 12:1-4(5-10)11-14; 1 Corinthians 11:23-26; John 13:1-17, 31b-35


Scripture standout: John 13: "After he had washed their feet, had put on his robe, and had returned to the table, he said to them, "Do you know what I have done to you? You call me Teacher and Lord--and you are right, for that is what I am. So if I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another's feet. For I have set you an example, that you also should do as I have done to you. Very truly, I tell you, servants are not greater than their master, nor are messengers greater than the one who sent them. If you know these things, you are blessed if you do them."


His Deed/The Day: I'm going to do-good you all (and your husbands) by making a book suggestion. Quickly, and covertly, download 50 Shades of Grey. I read it during our France trip to see what all the fuss was about. Let's just say it gives new meaning to the words "servant" and "master." My college girlfriend who suggested it warned me that I just might join the Mile-High Club if I read it on the plane, and I see what she means now! OK, so it's not a very reverent book to read during Holy Week. But it is a nasty little bit of literature that will help turn you into a Good Samaritan at bedtime. Wink, wink.


Deedsclosure: I could blab on and on about the trials of being a do-gooding wife in this department. But I won't because I struggle here — and it's Holy Week, Maundy Thursday to be exact, and this conversation sounds — so NOT holy. BUT, women who are wiser than I have said how important it is to be a Dolly Do-Gooder in this area. 'Nuff said.